The Ballad of Xena's Transformation

(To the tune of "The Ballad of Gilligan's Isle")

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale

A tale of a fateful day

When Xena the Warrior Princess changed her evil ways

The woman was a mighty warlord then

The leader of a large army

When she decided to secure her position by destroying one enemy

Destroying one enemy

She captured the Mighty Hercules

In order to do him in

But he ended up helping her reverse her ways of sin

Reverse her ways of sin

She started down the path of good with help from some new friends

There's Gabrielle

Salmoneus, too

The Mighty Joxer

And her horse

The King of Thieves

The Amazons and

Her Mom

Here to lend Xena aid!

Now this is the tale of our Warrior gal

She's dedicated as can be

To making up for her wicked past

And changing history

The Princess and her Bardic pal

Will do whatever they can

To keep their fans guessing

If they prefer women or men

No rhyme

No reason

No sense at all

Not a smidge of accuracy

Like drunken monkeys typing

There's no continuity

So join her here each week, Xenites

You're sure to get perplexed

From watching Gab and Xena

Play with the subtext!